Overwhelmed by Sadness

A few weeks ago, during the God for Dummies series, my father gave a sermon using a story of "Aunt Ethel" to illustrate that even good people go to hell if they haven't accepted Jesus into their heart. As I was sitting backstage listening to these heartbreaking words, my eyes began to water and my mind kept coming back to one person. For confidentiality reasons we'll call her Sarah.

I've known Sarah for roughly a year now, and during that time, I've seen Sarah an average of five days a week from 9 AM - 3 PM -- we're both music majors, so we tend to see a lot of each other. Because of our close quarters, Sarah and I have become best friends, and hang out frequently even when we are not at school. I know everything about Sarah's family, past relationships, current boyfriend, and personal secrets, and vice-versa.

Sarah's history with the church is not a good one. When she was younger, she used to attend church regularly with her parents and younger sister. She told me how much she enjoyed going to church with her dad especially. However on May 23rd, 2007, Sarah's father had a massive heart attack while on a business trip and died before his family could even make it to the hospital to say good-bye. Ever since that time, Sarah has sworn off religion because she is angry with God and doesn't want to follow/worship someone who would take her father away from her at such an early age.

As understandable as her anger and frustration with God is, she continues to hold on to that bitterness and will not express it in any way. Obviously, there is no ONE way to handle a situation like this, because every person is different, and as her friend, I want to help her release some of the anger she has towards God. However, every time I tell her that it's OK to be angry at God and she just needs to TELL GOD that she's angry with him, she says she doesn't even want to talk to him. Therefore, this makes it very difficult to get her to accept my invitation to come to CCC.

I have invited her on several occasions, even bribed her saying I would drive and take her and her boyfriend out to lunch afterwards. Well, her boyfriend won't come -- he practices Islam -- and her built-up anger keeps her far, far away from any type of church service. However, she has promised me that she will come eventually... so I continue to be patient, show her God's love, and wait...

Back to the original story of Aunt Ethel. Sarah is the modern day Aunt Ethel. She loves all of her friends, family, and lives a great life. She believes in abstaining from sex until marriage, she doesn't do drugs, and all-around, she stays within the rules. Anyone who knows Sarah thinks she is such a nice, perfect little angel. But like we heard this Sunday... there is a "God-shaped hole" in her heart, and if she doesn't fill that with Him, she will spend eternity apart from God. This is what brought tears to my eyes and made my heart drop right out of my chest backstage. I continue to pray for her to find God even if it's not through me, but every day that passes is another day she says "No, I don't want You God." This is when I become overwhelmed by sadness.

Now I know everyone has a person like this in their life... it's the whole reason we started Chapter 2 and the "Reaching the 60,000" campaign. But it's not easy... we are doing great things in two locations for God, but this is not where the buck stops. We must continue to fight for every soul, no matter the cost, no matter how embarrassing or difficult it is for you to address the issue. Invite, invite, invite. Then let God do His thing. We know he can handle it... He saved a wretch like me.